"Life is like breakfast you just mix all ingredients cause in your stomach it will all come together."
"I never completed high school and I'm very rich and very successful."
"I like Fisher Price music, nursery rhymes and the alphabet song."
"They should legalize pot, do it!! do it!!"
"I'm the greatest rock and roll drummer on the planet and you suck."
"I don't see anything on it, all I see is show. There is never anything on it. Just mtv talking about how cool mtv is."
"I have a homosexual crush on most adolescents"
"It's, like, an ok tour bus and all, but people see book mobile on the side and come up and ask us if we have any book to sell. I mean how stupid is that...books? We don't even read."
"Lets count the waves...one, one thousand, two one thousand."
"I live in a bucket."
"It used to be Mike, but lately I've been catching up."
"I always said that the world is a better place because of Joey Ramone."
"I can suck my own."
"Music has never been at a better time then it is right now, we're really lucky to be a part of this wonderful thing called music."
"I wanna survive an avalanche, I wanna be one of those people a dog finds buried under a ton of snow, almost dying of starvation."
"We kick ass now. We've seen a million faces and we rocked them all."
"Smoke 'em if you got 'em."
"I love her you don't understa - a - a - a - and!" (impersonating a donkey)
"It's not how you pick your nose, it's where you put that booger that counts."
"I wish people would turn off their computers, go outside, talk to people, touch people, lick people, enjoy eachother's company and smell eachother on the rump."
"It's better to regret something you have done than to regret something you haven't done."
"Hey, I framed my crotch for you guys.. diamond dave!! "
"We keep our receipts kids."
"We have a thin candy shell, I'm surprised you didn't know that."
"School is practise for the future, and practise makes perfect and nobodys perfect so why bother"
"You gotta play for as many people as you can. It's, like, if someone wants to see you, and they, you know, can't, then that's lame."
"We're charging what we're worth and we don't think we're worth $22.50. We take a lower cut than Pearl Jam."
"It's a good song, toot toot, fuck you. Robert Smith, eat our dust."
"(Talking about Mike taking a shit off the hotel balcony): "She was so pissed, so she was gonna make us leave the hotel..but she didn't. big mistake!"
"You'd think we were really good at writing songs or something."
"(To LAUNCH.com on the US's action after the WTC bombings): "I object. I object to any killing at all. You know, it's terrible what happened and I think retaliation definitely makes sense and it's definitely one option. But, personally, I prefer peace. You know, maybe I'm just being ignorant and shortsighted, you know, it's true I'm not running the government, I'm not running the United States. I just don't think that killing people is a good way to remedy people dying. Martin Luther King Jr., said that you can murder a murderer but you can never murder murder itself."
"Mmm, you can almost smell the burning pork...Hey, you ever thrown rocks at cops?"
"You know, I knew the day that George Bush was elected president that we were in deep, deep sh-t. I knew it. I was like, 'Well, some sh-t's gonna hit the fan now,' 'cause, you know, the Bush family's been in the politics business for way too long to not have crazy enemies."
"I want to wash your grandmother."
"I don't understand what Billie just said so, I'll talk about chickens...."
"It's good to have some offspring...oops..shouldn't say that word, can you edit it out?"
"It was the pile of shit I ever saw." (on the MTV Video Music Award's in '95)
"You can't fuck with us now. We did it. We pulled it off." (talking about the record that was stolen and how they created a better album anyway)
"I told my dad yeah I'm going to be a drummer and he said well of you can rub your stomach at the same time as you pat your head at the same time you're standing on one leg and kicking the other one out in a circle and say the pl- I don't have to tell you that.
"We don't like superstars and rock idols."
"Prosthetic head is better than no head in the morning."
"When I die, they'll bury me in an Anvil case-- with wheels."
"We miss heavy metal."
"When was the last time you saw someone go off stage to snort cocaine in the middle of there neck?"
"Mike, the craziest son-of-a-bitch that ever walked the planet."
"People think that we're just these good-looking guys with these really big dicks that play really hot fucking rock and roll. But we're sensitive, and we have feelings too. edge of allegiance. And I did all that just like bam you know?"
"Roll roll roll a joint, twist
it at the ends, light it up and take a puff and pass it to your friends."
"I think there’s an afterlife. I’ve had some very ghostly experiences. We’ve stayed in straight haunted places and even played haunted places. You go to some places and you can feel they’re a little creepier. The Convention Hall Hotel in Ashbury Park, New Jersey, is full of ghosts. Once, we all walked into the lobby of the hotel, and I saw all these old people with bandages, and I saw this guy with his leg chopped off, and he was just sitting there in the lobby with his crutches by his side, kinda creeping on us. We all walked by him…and it turns out nobody saw him but me. And then, later, I found out the hotel used to be a military hospital in World War II, and they brought all the horribly injured GIs back from Europe, all the amputees and real wrecks, and they put them in there. "But I’ve done too many psychedelic drugs, smoked too many spliffs and drunk too many pints to actually be a credible witness of the occult or the afterlife. I imagine seeing giant bunny rabbits on the side of the road when I’m driving. That’s when I pull over. (The Ghosts of Dead Serviceman Haunt their Final Resting Place, Kerrang!)"
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